3 Rituals for Letting Go

What is your relationship with letting go?

Ritual and magical practice can help us with more than manifesting, attracting, and calling in. It can also help us shed, let go, and transform ourselves and parts of our lives. The winter season invites us to incubate, release, and hibernate. It is an ideal time for release work (as well as the fall!). The phases of the moon that correspond to release are all the waning phases - the waning gibbous moon, the last quarter moon, the waning crescent moon, and the dark moon. Learn more about the phases of the moon with The Ritual Deck (pictured below.)

Before we get into the rituals, I also want to add that we can put a lot of pressure on ourselves to let go of things, and I want to honor that letting go can be really hard. Especially if what we’re letting go of has been something we have loved and cherished but is no longer a fit, feels comfortable, and/or feels safe. 

So please, be gentle with yourself, be kind to yourself, and let release happen on your own timeline. 

Keep scrolling to find a few rituals to support you in letting go.

MOON RITUAL FOR LETTING GO

Our sweet, gorgeous moon is more than just an archetype, a deity, or energy. She is a real living body just like the Earth that we can go outside and look at, connect with, and talk to. I think sometimes we forget this but this is one of my favorite practices! 

This is ideal to do when the moon is in its waning phases but still visible (so not the dark moon). 

For this ritual, what you’ll need is yourself, an offering for the moon, and clarity on what you’re releasing. Your offering could be anything - a plate of your dinner, a glass of water, a branch, a flower, a drawing, a song - let your intuition guide you and go with what feels right. 

When you have your offering, it’s ideal to go outside and sit or stand under the moon. If it’s really cold out or you don’t have space outdoors to do this, you can also sit by a window - that works just as well! 

Take some time to center and ground yourself, entering a ritual space. Turn your gaze to the moon, ask to connect with her, and share your offering with her. Spend some time gazing at her and share your offering with her in whatever way feels good to you.

When you’re ready, tell her what you’re desiring to release. Ask for her help letting go. Sit in meditation, drawing down her energy and light through your crown and your whole body, letting this energy fill you up and either help you release whatever you’re desiring to release internally (blocks, fears, internal limits, ways of talking to self, etc), or charge you with the courage and power to release externally (a relationship, a job, a situation, project, etc.). 

When you feel the energy shift, you know you’re finished! Thank the moon, ground yourself again, and spend some time journaling and processing afterward. 

TAROT OR ORACLE SPREAD FOR LETTING GO

For this ritual, you’ll need your tarot or oracle deck and journal. Take some time to create a ritual space, whatever that means to you, and ground yourself before working with your cards. Set the intention to communicate with your highest self, spirit guides, ancestors, intuition, or any other deities or beings you had a relationship with.

Once you’re fully present, shuffle your deck and pull cards for the following questions:

1. What do I need to let go of at this time?

2. Why do I need to let go?

3. What is on the other side of this release?

4. Supportive energies to connect with to help me let go.

Take your time with each card, really letting its messages move through you. I find it incredibly helpful to either meditate with my cards or journal about each card and what the spread means to me. I always get more information and a deeper understanding this way.

When you feel complete, it could be nice to add the cards to your altar - particularly the first and third cards - to support you throughout the release. 

CANDLE MAGICK FOR LETTING GO

I love working with fire in spells and rituals, so naturally, I love candle magick! Fire is such a powerful element with its ability to transform and transmute - think of how fire turn logs into ash. It helps things change shape, die, and transform. 

For this spell, you’ll need a black candle, a tarot card or oracle card representing what you’re releasing, and a safety pin to carve your candle.

Start by grounding yourself and casting your circle. Call in any supportive deities, guides, or other beings you have a connection with to join your circle and help you.

Next, you’ll want to intentionally choose the card from your deck that most represents what you’re releasing at this time. Take your time with this and really make sure you’re clear on what you’re desiring to release.

Once you have your card, it’s time to carve your candle. Carve into your candle any words and/or symbols that represent letting go to you. For example, I like to carve the glyph for Pluto into my candles when I work with releasing spells. Pluto represents change, rebirth, and transformation. Symbols and words work best when they’re personal to you, so don’t worry as much about the technical meaning and just intuitively choose what feels right to you!

Once your candle is ready, set it up with your card under it and take a few deep breaths. Speak your intention aloud as you light your candle, saying, “As I light this candle, I release X.” You might like to spend some time gazing into the candle flame as you focus on this intention.

Then, it’s time to raise energy. You can raise energy however feels good to you - you might chant, sing, dance, do breathwork, or use any other tool that feels good to you. As your candle burns, you are raising energy in order to support this release.

When you feel the energy is at its peak, direct it with your intention towards releasing whatever it is you are releasing from your body, from your life. 

When you feel complete, ground yourself again. Let the candle burn all the way down, thank any beings who joined you to help facilitate this release, and re-open your circle. Spend some time processing in your journal afterward, writing down what came up for you and what you felt.

WATER MAGICK 101

Water is associated with the moon, the direction of the west, the Cups suit in the tarot, and the zodiac signs of Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces. Water signifies intuition, surrender, dreams, emotions, and psychic abilities. It is oceans, rivers, ponds, the moon, waterfalls, light rain, hurricanes, and tsunamis. It extinguishes fire and floods Earth. It cleanses and purifies, and connects us with the deepest parts of ourselves.

We can use the element of water in ritual, spellwork, and spiritual practice and that’s what I’ll be talking about in this blog. Keep scrolling to learn what water magick is and find different ways to practice it.

WHAT IS WATER MAGICK?

My favorite definition of magick comes from Starhawk, who said: “Magick is the ability to change energy at will.” So water magick is simply changing energy using the element of water and all that it represents, as I shared above.

We can do magick with any of the elements. There is air magick, fire magick, and Earth magick as well. But in this article, we’ll be exclusively exploring water magick.

SCRYING

Scrying is an ancient divination practice where you connect with your intuition and make the unseen seen by gazing onto a reflective surface. Some common reflective surfaces to use are the full moon or a black bowl filled with water.

You can do scrying with other substances such as fire, a crystal ball, or a mirror, but when working with water magick you want to choose something associated with water like the options I’ve shared above.

To begin your scrying practice, create a ritual space for yourself and either go outside and find a view of the moon or gather your bowl and water. As I walk you through scrying, I’ll use the example of a bowl of water. For this practice, you’ll want to be in a dark room with only one or two candles lit.

Once your space is ready, enter a trance state through meditating, energy work, drumming, chanting, breathwork, or any other practice that helps you drop into your subconscious mind.

Once you feel like you’re in an altered state of consciousness, relax your eyes and gaze into your bowl of water. Breathe deeply, let yourself soften, and ask a question silently (for example, what is holding me back in X situation? Or what do I need to know about Y?).

Gaze into the bowl and let yourself see what you see. It may take time for images to come up, but if you stay focused and present, they will. Allow the images, words, and sensations to flow, rather than holding on to them tightly.

When you feel like you’re done, you’re done! Spend some time journaling after about what you felt and saw to help you answer the questions you came to receive answers for. Remember, the subconscious mind works with symbolism, so don’t discount anything that you see even if you’re not quite sure what it means at first!

CLEANSING SPELL

This simple spell helps us use the element of water to release and is best worked during the waning and dark moon times. You’ll need:

A large glass of water

A piece of paper and pen

To start, choose what you’re focusing on releasing. Maybe is blocks to self-love, fear of being seen, a harmful way of speaking to yourself, or self-judgment.

Once you’ve decided what you’re ready to release (you’re welcome to spend some time journaling on this to get clear), start making a list of all the limiting beliefs and stories that you hold associated with this block.

For example, let’s say you’re working with clearing fear of being seen. Your list might hold beliefs like:

I’m not good enough

If people see who I really am, they won’t love me

I’m too weird

Keep letting the beliefs flow! I tend to fill up a whole page when I do this spell.

Once you have your list, it’s time to work the spell. Ground yourself, cast your circle, and pick up your list. You’re going to say the first belief out loud, starting with “I clear the belief that ________ from my body” and then taking a big sip of water. Pause and notice, feeling and visualizing the water moving through your body, cleansing this belief from your system on every level.

Repeat this for each belief on your list, taking your time and really feeling the beliefs move out of your body.

MOONGAZING

Personally, this is one of my favorite practices. It’s best done when the moon is full or around fullness. All you need is yourself, the moon, and your creativity for this practice.

In its simplest form, simply go outside, sit or stand under the moon, and gaze up at her beauty. Beam a heart full of love towards her, and feel her filling you up with her lunar energy.

You might like to take it further in a number of ways:

Drawing down the moon (opening up your arms and visualizing your crown opening to receive lunar energy

Singing to the moon

Writing poems to the moon and reading them to her

Asking her questions and sitting in meditation under her light to receive answers

There’s no right or wrong way to moon gaze. Let your intuition and creativity be your guide!

CHARGE WATER UNDER THE MOON

A powerful form of water magick is charging water under the full moon at night and then using it. In its simplest form, you simply drink the water. You can also use the water in spell workings, water your plants with it, or add it to your ritual bath (which we’ll explore below).

You are welcome to charge just a glass of water under the moon. However, you could also add a crystal to your glass that’s related to your intention for extra power. Here are some suggestions:

Rose quartz for a love infusion

Green aventurine for an abundance infusion

Amethyst for clear sight and intuition

Citrine for personal powerObsidian for protection

Carnelian for creativity

Clear quartz as an amplifier for any intention. Use alone or with another crystal!

You can work with any crystal you’d like, just remember that some crystals are water-soluble so check first to make sure it won’t dissolve in your water overnight.

SPEND TIME IN BODIES OF WATER

If you’re lucky enough to live near a body of water, going to that body of water whether it’s a lake, river, or ocean and immersing yourself in it for cleansing and purification is one of the most powerful forms of water magick there is. Turn a simple dip into magick by using your presence, breath, and intention to receive the medicine of the water.

Card featured from The Ritual Deck.

RITUAL BATH

If you can’t get to a body of water or it’s too cold to get in, a ritual bath is a beautiful way to immerse yourself in the power of water. In this blog post, I share some herbal bath recipes for specific intentions to help make your bath extra magical. But again, if all you bring to your bath is your presence, breath, and intention - that’s all the magick you need. Everything else is just an extra amplifier!

The Difference Between a Dark Moon & New Moon

There are two different schools of thought when it comes to differentiating between a new moon and a dark moon. Spoiler alert, there's not a right or wrong answer. The difference of opinion is between astronomers and Pagans. I'm going to share both schools of thought with you so you can decide what works better for you.

Here's the short answer to this query. A new moon can be a dark moon, a dark moon can be a new moon, a waxing crescent can be a new moon, but a waxing crescent can't be a dark moon. Make sense? I know, not really. Allow me to explain!

Cards featured from The Ritual Deck.

The Astronomer's New Moon

First, let's take a look at the astronomer's viewpoint. For astronomers, the new moon happens when the moon is in between, or in conjunction, with the Earth and Sun. When the moon is in between the Earth and the Sun, it appears entirely dark for us.

I know what you're probably thinking, sounds like a dark moon, right? No. For astronomers, this point of the moon cycle is considered the new moon because it marks the beginning of a new moon cycle. Most astronomers do not use the term "dark moon," there's only the new moon. This is why most moon phase calendars don't recognize a dark moon phase.

The Pagan's New Moon

For many Pagans, practicing witches, and moon followers, the dark moon happens when the moon is dark and in conjunction with the Earth and the Sun (the astronomer's new moon). The new moon follows after the dark moon phase when the moon begins to show the tiniest illumination of its waxing or growth phase.

Cards featured from The Ritual Deck.

The Importance of The Dark Moon

For Pagan's and the like, the dark moon phase marks an important phase in the cycle of the moon. The dark moon phase represents a time of rest, integration, and observance. If you're using the moon for spellwork and manifesting it only makes sense that you would work in a night or two of reflection, especially before the busy energy of the new moon.

Astronomers and Pagans obviously use the moon cycles for entirely different purposes, so it's not surprising that they recognize the phases a little differently. As I said, there's not a wrong answer here, simply different opinions for different purposes.

Your manifesting won't be thrown askew if you skip the dark moon phase, but the dark moon will offer you a sweet moment of rest.

Three Dark Moon Rituals

The dark moon is one of my personal favorite times of the cycle. It’s the last few days of the waning time of the cycle, when the moon continues to shrink and eventually disappears from the sky.

Different traditions honor the dark moon at different times. Personally, I honor the dark moon when you can’t see the moon at all in the sky--which is technically the new moon. Others honor the dark moon the last few days before the new moon. I recommend using your intuition and noticing how you feel during these days to understand when to honor the dark moon versus new moon.

So what is the dark moon all about?

The dark moon is our time for radical rest, for deep clearing and releasing, and turning within. This is the time to cancel plans, to do shadow work, to go to sleep early and wake up late, and to pull tarot or oracle cards to tune in to your inner voice.

Keep scrolling for a few rituals to consider working with at this time.

WATER SPELL FOR CLEARING

One of my favorite spells to work during the dark moon is this simple water spell. Water is a helpful element for cleansing and purification, and this spell works especially well when the dark moon is in a water sign--Pisces, Cancer, or Scorpio. You’ll need:

• A large glass of water

• A piece of paper and pen

To start, choose what you’re focusing on releasing. Maybe there are blocks to self-expression, fear of being rejected, shame around your path, or blocks to abundance. Once you’ve decided what you’re ready to release (you’re welcome to spend some time journaling on this to get clear), start making a list of all the limiting beliefs and stories that you hold associated with this block.For example, let’s say you’re working with clearing blocks to abundance. Your list might hold beliefs like:

• I can’t make money doing what I love

• People with money are jerks

• It’s wrong to have money when other people have so little, etc.

Keep letting the beliefs flow! I tend to fill up a whole page when I do this spell.

Once you have your list, it’s time to work the spell. Ground yourself, cast your circle, and pick up your list. You’re going to say the first belief out loud, starting with “I clear the belief that ________ from my body” and then taking a big sip of water. Pause and notice, feeling and visualizing the water moving through your body, cleansing this belief from your system on every level.

Repeat this for each belief on your list, taking your time and really feeling the beliefs move out of your body.

Card featured from The Ritual Deck

When you’re done, use the energy of your palms to charge your last sip of water with what you do want - abundance, healthy self-expression, creativity, etc. - and feel your whole body being charged with this intention by the power of the element of water.

Give thanks to water and the Universe for their help, ground yourself again and open your circle.

CANDLE MAGICK FOR RELEASING

For this spell, you’ll need:

• Black taper candle

• Carving tool like a sharp point crystal, toothpick, or athame

• Black tourmaline, smoky quartz, or petrified wood

• A simple oil like grapeseed or bergamot essential oil

• Rosemary

Start by cleansing all of your items for the spell. This can be done by wafting rosemary smoke over them or visualizing light cleansing them.

For this spell, you’ll be carving what you’re releasing into your candle as well as the glyph for Pluto, the planet that helps things die and be transformed. For your words, keep them simple and powerful by carving the basics of what you’re releasing like “fear” or “self-doubt.”

Anoint your candle with your oil and roll it in your dried rosemary. As you carve and anoint your candle, visualize your all of whatever you’re releasing - your fear or your self-doubt as in the example above - pouring into the candle.

Place your crystal(s) and candle on your altar, light your candle, and start meditating on the flame. Continue to visualize all that you’re releasing pouring into the candle, and watch as it burns and turns to smoke. Stay with this meditation until you feel a shift in your energy - until you really feel a release.

Let the candle burn out if you can or snuff out the candle and continue the same spell each night until the candle has burned completely.

SHADOW WORK TAROT OR ORACLE SPREAD

The dark moon is a deep invitation into shadow work.

What is shadow work?

Simply put, it’s an intentional exploration of our shadow side - the parts of ourselves that we reject, that we’re ashamed of, that we stuff down and hide. Click here to learn more about shadow work if you’re new to it!

For this ritual, you’ll want to create a ritual space - whatever that means to you. For me, it usually means cleansing my space with smoke beforehand, lighting incense, and lighting candles. Maybe you also like to take an essential oil bath beforehand, or sprinkle herbs in a circle around you.

All you’ll need for this ritual is:

• A journal and pen

• Your tarot or oracle cards

Spend a few moments grounding yourself, then shuffle your cards and pull a card for each of these questions:

• What part of my shadow is rising to the surface to be worked with?

• How has rejecting this part of myself manifested in my life?

• How can I show this part of myself more love and integrate it into my whole self?

Give yourself the gift of sitting with your cards after you pull them. Spend time meditating on your cards, journaling about them, or even painting with them to process and understand what their messages are for you.